thefatjewish

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish

CALL ME KIM CARBDASHIAN Emailio.Addresstevez@gmail
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


Stop giving fucks. FILE FOR FUCK BANKRUPTCY AND NEVER LOOK BACK.

22 Hours ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


JUST A FRIENDLY REMINDER THAT SOME OF THE PEOPLE YOU KNOW ARE HUMAN GARBAGE AND YOU NEED TO CUTTTTT ITTTTTT

2 Days ago
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thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


OK DAMN STEVE WITH THE SALT AND PEPPER COULD DEFINITELY GET IT (And I’m not even gay) (tw: @gilkeascharged)

3 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


AND LICKING THE LID. PLEASE DON’T LICK THE LID. (Now imagine your dad licking the lid in suuuuper slo mo)

3 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


I will disappear without warning, without a fucking trace. Years from now, you’ll be at a gelato stand in Florence and you’ll see someone you think might be me wearing white linen and multiple silk scarves. I’ll wink at you knowingly.

7 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


PLEASE TURN THE VOLUME ALL THE WAY UP. THIS VIDEO OF OPRAH AT A PHOTOSHOOT IS ME ON THE TINIEST BIT OF DESIGNER DRUGS.

7 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


Chrissy Teigen is a national fucking treasure, she should live in the Smithsonian Museum.

7 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


CHARLIE SHEEN’S RAGING RELENTLESS COCAINE PROBLEM WAS HEADLINE NEWS (tw: @gsheffr)

14 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


TODAY IS THE 10,935TH CONSECUTIVE DAY THAT I HAVEN’T USED FUCKING ALGEBRA

14 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


The last time I saw the Google maps car driving towards me I spazzed out and started pretending to aggressively masturbate and was immediately ashamed of myself.

16 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


HE FARTS IN THE BATHTUB AND TRIES TO BITE THE BUBBLES

17 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


VOLUME WAY ⬆️⬆️. In my entire life I have never connected with a human on a deeper level than a husky 9 year old who is fucking PISSED that he isn’t going to Hooters.

17 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


AND I’LL LET YOU FUCKING MANIACS VOTE TO DECIDE WHICH MEME. AND I’LL DO IT ON IG LIVE. SAD JORDAN, HARAMBE SUCKING OFF SALT BAE, DAT BOi, DOGGO PUPPER, KERMIT TALKING TO DARTH KERMIT, CONCERNED BLACK GUY ON THE PHONE, THE BLUE/ GOLD DRESS, SAD KEANU REEVES, WHAT THE FUCK EVERRRRR YOU WANT

20 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


YOU’RE A GHOST DRIVING A MEAT COVERED SKELETON ON A ROCK HURLING THROUGH OUTER SPACE, YOU’RE DOING GREAT, YOU’LL FIGURE IT ALL OUT.

23 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


If I had a father-in-law, I’d 100% prefer to eat pasta strained through his underpants after a stressful day of work than run a 5K with him.

28 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


ARE PEOPLE WORKING? NOT WORKING? I’M DRUNK AT NOON. ATE COOKIES FOR BREAKFAST. THIS TIME OF YEAR IS SO FUCKING CONFUSING. (tw: @benoo_brown)

28 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


YOUR AUNT HAS CONSUMED SO MUCH FUCKING CHARDONNAY AND IT’S TIME TO GO

29 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


My grandmother is 92 and HORNY. She met her current boyfriend, Arthur, in the pool while doing low impact exercising to “Timber” by Ke$ha.

30 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


It’s the most, wonderful time, fuck you Dad.

31 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


LITERALLY FUCKING KcND560nL14DX7bbJ88SOk15 (LETTER O/NUMBER 0 CONFUSION ABOUND)

31 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


32 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


Turning your head all the way around to look, lowering the music, a person on the street watching and judging... IT’S JUST NOT FUCKING WORTH IT (tw: @holyscum)

33 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


Also, you come to realize that most likely, your dad has 69’ed with your mom.

35 Days ago
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thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


Most times, doing cocaine makes you an unbearable motormouth whose breath smells like hobo anus. But once in a while, it produces INCREDIBLE ideas that will change the world. (tw: @mokishome)

38 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


THIS IS THE FIRST YEAR I’VE EVER GIVEN A FUCK ABOUT CHRISTMAS, ONLY BECAUSE I KNEW I’D GET TO SEE THIS KID AGAIN

39 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


SHOUTS TO DADS WHO GIVE ZERO FUCKS ABOUT ANYTHING OTHER THAN WORK, GAS PRICES, AND MAINTAINING THEIR THICK INCREDIBLE MUSTACHE

39 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


OH SHIT MY BAD, SORRY IVAN IN THE NISSAN ROGUE! AUTOMATIC 5 STARS DUDE!

40 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


IF THIS VIDEO DOESN’T MAKE YOU EVEN A LITTLE HAPPY YOU ARE A FUCKING MONSTER WHO IS COMPLETELY DEAD INSIDE

42 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


IMAGINE BEING DISQUALIFIED BECAUSE OF YOUR BIG OL’ DICK

43 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


I’VE ALREADY HAD LIKE 20 HUMAN BEINGS INTERACT WITH ME TODAY, IT’S A FUCKING NIGHTMARE

43 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


VOLUME ⬆️⬆️. THE 2016 PRESIDENTIAL DEBATES GAVE ME RAGING ANXIETY UNTIL I NEEDED A XANAX SMOOTHIE, BUT THIS VIDEO IS GREAT AND WHOEVER MADE IT IS A TRUE ARTIST SUCK IT JACKSON POLLOCK ( @luckytelevisie)

44 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


I’M AT LUNCH NOT TALKING TO THE PERSON I’M WITH, BUT INSTEAD LOOKING AT A FACEBOOK PHOTO OF THE LUNCH BELONGING TO A GIRL I HAVEN’T SEEN SINCE I FINGERED HER IN 2007

44 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


A lot of protest signs have been made since the Trump administration began, but none are better than this one.

44 Days ago