thefatjewish

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish

Emailio.Addresstevez@gmail You can't get an STD if you never get tested.
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


The consequences didn't matter, when you needed a new No Doubt song, YOU FUCKING NEEDED IT

21 Hours ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


You thought putting a giant belt in the middle of that dress would work, but NOPE.

1 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


@tpain you are a fucking visionary, you're like Magellan with a big ass chain

1 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


WHAT IS EVERYONE ON THE INTERNET OUTRAGED ABOUT TODAY?

2 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


I went to a gay wedding recently where they walked down the aisle to a harpist playing Sisqo's "Thong Song." It was fucking gorgeous. (tw: @jonlovett)

3 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


I'm walking behind a Dutch family in New York City right now who is moving sooooo slow I want to punch them each in the back of the head individually.

4 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


This game was about as fun as watching Steve Buscemi aggressively floss his teeth after eating a lamb chop.

6 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


7 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


WE'RE ALL GONNA BE LIVING ON MARS IN 70 YEARS AND IT'S GONNA BE HOT AND DUSTY AND UNBEARABLE, LIKE COACHELLA WITHOUT ALL THE WRISTBANDS (tw: @harlemrenaissance)

8 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


9 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


YES I'M A MAN IN MY 30'S WHO IS A DIEHARD JONAS BROTHERS FAN AND KEVIN IS MY FUCKING FAVORITE DON'T ME

9 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


Never fucking forget. 9/11

9 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


Sometimes I just roll around with my Uber driver for a whole night, bringing a 45 year old Korean dude wearing True Religion jeans into a house party with me is such a strong look. ( @tanyaphilip)

10 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


Irma sounds like an old Jewish woman with raging IBS and a cat hoarding problem, so probably not. ( @thefunnyintrovert)

10 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


14 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


SHOUTOUT TO THE MOTHERFUCKING DREAMERS

14 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


I was looking at a physical photograph today and TRIED TO ZOOM IN ON IT WITH MY FINGERS (tw: @kappa_kappa)

14 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


I'M CARRYING AROUND A LIGHT JACKET RIGHT NOW THAT I WAS WEARING EARLIER AND I'M FUCKING FURIOUS ABOUT IT

16 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


STAY AT HOME AND FILL A ONESIE WITH YOUR FARTS

18 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


I used to be able to chug warm brown liquor and put cocaine in my butthole until 7 am then wake up and immediately go do some sweet shit, like archery. Now I have four margaritas and I wake up looking and feeling like adult Macaulay Culkin (although he recently got hunky) and need to hydrate for three straight days.

18 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


I'd rather strain my pasta through my dad's underpants than eat a vegan genderless gingerbread person. ( @sadmichaeljordan)

19 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


FUCK YOU DR. BERNSTEIN (unless you're following me on here, in which case ahahhahaha I'm just joking and will see you next Friday at 2 pm)

19 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


I am exhausted the entire day and then I finally get into bed and proceed to google photos of animals playing basketball until all hours of the fucking night

20 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


Why am in a banana hammock shredding a solo on an axe with ice cold drinks, a yellow camo truck and a bodacious babe? BECAUSESUMMER @malibu_rum

20 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


This dude definitely has no fucking idea what Instagram is, and I love that about him.

20 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


THAT GIRL ALWAYS HAD REALLY LONG HAIR RIGHT, LIKE MAYBE A LONG BRAID, AND COVERED HER PAPER DURING TESTS

20 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


DO IT. Especially if he has a tattoo of a dragon/bible verse or is named Greg/Derek. (tw: @jfahmy) Harvey

20 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


21 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


I recently told a girl that you can't get an STD when mercury is in retrograde.

21 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


RARE NOTE WRITTEN BY BEYONCÉ IN 1990, SHE ALWAYS KNEW SHE'D BE THE DIVA QUEEN OF YOU PEASANTS

22 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


Remember, Kanye once sold a blank white t-shirt for $200-a-pop and Asians lined up for days to get it, literally sleeping outside of the fucking store. (tw: @percxcet)

22 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


He was becoming too much of a raging fucking diva, he'll only drink Voss water.

23 Days ago
thefatjewish (thefatjewish) Instagram Photos and Videos

thefatjewish

@thefatjewish


Comment from thefatjewish:


There are rare moments when humans are less flaming hot garbage than usual, and in those moments I don't want to be shot directly into the fucking sun. This is one of those. (tw: @fishblanc, @25park)

23 Days ago